Some interesting facts !!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~DID YOU KNOW~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One of the reasons marijuana is illegal today because cotton growers in the 30s lobbied against hemp farmers-they saw it as competition. Itis not chemically addictive as is nicotine, alcohol, or caffeine.

=========================GRAFITTI ===============================

• People have one thing in common: they are all different.
• A bore is someone who deprives you of solitude without providing youwith company
• I either want less corruption, or more chances to participate in it.
• Flattery is hearing from others the things you have already thoughtabout yourself.
• The probability of someone watching you is proportional to thestupidity of your action.

==========================FUNNY quotes FROM famous===============================

• "Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas."-- Keppel Enderbery
• "If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."-- former U.S.. President Bill Clinton,
• "The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guylike Norman Einstein."-- Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst.
• "I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix."-- former U.S. Vice President Dan Quayle
• "It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's theimpurities in our air and water that are doing it."-- former U.S. Vice President Al Gore
• "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime ratesin the country,"-- Marion Barry, Mayor of Washington, D.C.
• "Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part ofyour life,"-- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become Spokesperson for theFederal Anti-smoking Campaign.

=========================MANAGEMENT LESSONS===============================

Lesson Number One

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?" The crow answered "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it. Management Lesson: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

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Lesson Number Two

A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love tobe able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but Ihaven't got the energy.""Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree. Management Lesson: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

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Lesson Number Three

When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss. The Brain said, "I should be Boss because I control the whole body's responses and functions." The feet said, "We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go." The hands said, "We should be Boss because we do all the work and earn all the money." And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally the asshole spoke up. All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the Boss. So the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work. Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the Feet twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered. Eventually they all decided that asshole should be the Boss, so the motion was passed. All the other parts did all the work while the Boss just sat and passed out the shit! Management Lesson: You don't need brains to be a Boss - any asshole will do.

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Lesson Number Four

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the f rozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy and soon began to sing for joy.A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung and promptly dug him out and ate him! Management Lessons: 1) Not everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy. 2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend. 3) And when you're in deep shit, keep your mouth shut!

====================Some more Ramblings ============================

I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net incomeI found being an electrician interesting, but the work was shockingI got a job as a historian but I realized there was no future in itI studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have the patientsMy first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn't concentrateI worked in a muffler factory but that was exhaustingI worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axI was a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it. It was a so-so job

==================English is a funny language ===========================

There is no egg in eggplant or ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple...Is cheese the plural of choose?If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?In what language do people recite at a play, and play at a recital?Ship by truck, and send cargo by ship?Have noses that run and feet that smell?Park on driveways and drive on parkways? Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce, and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth?One goose, 2 geese. So, one moose, 2 meese?One index, two indices? How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?When a house burns up, it burns down. You fill in a form by filling it out, and an alarm clock goes off by going on.When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it?.English muffins were not invented in England or French fries in France. How can 'slim chance and a fat chance' be the same, while ' wise man and a wise guy' are opposites?